How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend or
Ex Husband Back
Would you like to know how to get your ex
back? If so, set a plan of action by working on the following steps if you want to get your ex husband back
or get your ex boyfriend back.
Step 1 – Think carefully about why it was that you broke up in the first
Are you one of those people that just want your man back
because you believe that you can't have him or don’t want someone else to have him? Or do you simply like the
notion of being married to someone (anyone) or having a boyfriend you can call your own? Alternatively, did
you just like him with no greater emotional attachment or longer term ambition? Were either of you violent,
abusive, controlling, nasty, or possessive? Was the relationship the result of so called “match making” by
third parties without any emotional investment at stake? Did unfaithfulness (cheating) occur in the
relationship? If you can relate to any of these things happening, then you should take time out to give some
careful consideration and reappraisal before even thinking about returning to that type of relationship.
Step 2 – Try and be the girl your man first fell in love with
Your man was attracted to you because being with you made
him feel good and you were taking care of his emotional needs. What has since happened to change this? Take a good
hard look at yourself and correct any bad habits and mistakes if they have crept in. Try and be positive and upbeat
when in his company. Laughter and smiles always help. Staying positive is important to feeling good about yourself
and for making friends around you.
(Words Of Wisdom!) Try not to appear as if you're stuck in the past, however. Give
signals to your ex boyfriend or ex husband that you're moving on with your life by going to different places
and wearing different types of clothes than you normally would. Doing this will send out a clear subliminal
message that you are appearing to be moving on with your life.
Step 3 – Those all important first words: think about what you will
initially say to your ex boyfriend or ex husband is of paramount importance. Your chances of getting your ex
boyfriend back will dwindle if you say the wrong words at the very outset. Don’t start crying, being needy
and begging him to come back to you. In most cases this won’t cut it. If you do he is likely to feel
even more annoyed and will be driven further away from you – a bad move. While he may have been
the one who ended the relationship, there is still a good chance that he has feelings for you and may respond
positively if you don’t rush it or threaten him in any way.
4 – Look at how you can use the past to your
Has he ever passed positive comments about your clothing or
hair style? If so then wear it again. What about reminiscing and sharing a light-hearted moment with
him. If you have an opportunity to catch up with your ex boyfriend or ex husband, do it at a memorable place you
both used to hang out at together.
- Listen carefully to his choice of words
If he has a habit of using an unusual or uncommon word or
phrase, try and casually slip it into the conversation again. Don’t do it out of
context. Instead look for an appropriate cue. This can subconsciously tells him that
he and you share similarities due to exclusive and similar ways of talking.
Step 6 – Establish whether your ex still cares about you
Before you invest heavily in trying to win back your ex’s
heart, you’ll need to find out for certain whether he still cares for you or not. If he doesn’t, and you’re
absolutely hell bent on getting him back into your life, then you need to understand the most subtle ways to get
him to start caring in even the slightest way. Knowing if your ex still cares about you at all is the first
most important clue and glimmer of hope that the relationship has a chance of repair. Testing this out
first is simply your small but rapidly closing window of opportunity.
– See whether he’s prepared to do something together with you that is
You can casually ask whether he'd like to do something on a
non-committal basis such as go out for a drink, having a BBQ with mutual friends, a game of bowls or seeing a band.
Pick something that friends and first dates alike can do without the need to pair off. Whatever it happens to be,
try and keep it fun. Give serious talks a miss for the time being. You'll have enough time and opportunity to
talk about that later if things work well. Rushing in too quick with the serious stuff can be very
threatening and off-putting to a lot of guys. If he’s the one who initiates it, you can follow his lead. Just don't
go heavy too early.
Step 8 - Let him know that your thoughts had recently turned to him
Do you recollect the time you both went out to dine at that
really cool restaurant or café and had a great time together? Email or text him with a brief message telling
him you recently ate there and thought about him. You can add in a short “by the way” and ask how he is
getting along. This can be used as a good non-threatening means of having a light conversation or
“ice-breaker”, if you will, and a small request for a response back.
Step 9 – Casually invite him to speak with
Tell him you were disappointed things weren't working out
between you and see whether he’s prepared to talk about it now that you’ve had an opportunity to reflect. Ask
your ex boyfriend or ex husband if what went wrong was connected to what you've been working on since the
break-up. He may very well have quite a different perspective of the situation!
10 – Enhance your appearance if it’s in need of some
If you’ve been neglecting your appearance you may need a
“spruce up” to get yourself looking the best you can. Go to a salon and pamper
yourself. Have your nails and hair done. Indulge yourself with a nice warm bubble
bath and select a nice outfit to wear. Pampering yourself will not only make you look
good but you’ll also feel good about yourself as well.
– Be yourself and stop worrying about how people might perceive
At the end of the day, it really doesn't matter what people
think. It's virtually impossible to be true to yourself if you're focused on wondering "Does such as such think I'm
cool? Does he think I'm fat? Do they think I'm dumb?" In order to be yourself, you need to get
over these fears and concerns and simply let the real you shine on, with only your consideration of others as a
filter—not their consideration of you.
- If you’re break-up is fresh just ignore him completely
Your ex will call or otherwise contact you if he
fundamentally likes you. If he doesn't then it’s unlikely that anything you say, wear or do will alter that.
This tact works unless of course you’re ex is a guy that believes that if you aren't making the first move in
coming after him, then you don't care. In some situations this approach may be like a dual edged
sword. Why? Because ignoring him may make him feel like you’re fine and dandy without him and are moving
on. This, of course, is the polar opposite of what you’re trying to achieve when
attempting to get back with your guy. Given this possibility, it pays to be absolutely clear about what exact type
of man you’re dealing with when attempting to get him back.
– Always keep in the back of your mind that no situation is completely
Couples reunite everyday, irrespective of the situation that
caused the split. As the saying goes, “hope springs eternal”. You just
have to believe it and believe in yourself. The fact that you're seeking advice for how to get your ex back means
that you have hope!
Step 14 - If you’ve given it your all and reconciliation doesn’t work, move on
If you've done your very best to mend the relationship and
it simply won’t be forced, then the best way forward is to agree with the break-up, accept it and move forward as a
single. Despite feelings of despair and hopelessness, there is life after a break-up and new
opportunities for love to flourish.
– Look for other things to focus your gaze on
If you can manage to divert your attention away from your ex
and on to new and different things and activities, there will be less time to miss his presence. Over time, you
will begin feeling stronger, more buoyant and in greater control of your life. If you have agreed to
maintain contact, your ex will see these changes in you and see that you have "moved on".
Would you like more help in getting your ex boyfriend or ex husband back?
If so, the How To Win Him Back system expertly developed by a woman
(Jemima Fox) for women, may well be worth a look.
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